5 Tips to Free Yourself From Bullies
Given the frequency with which bullies use their power inappropriately in the workplace, in friendships and of course, in dating and marriage, let’s look at what can be done to confront and stop the bully in their tracks.
You can set yourself free from bullying with the tips below;
First, anticipate the aggression of bullies. While bullies often overwhelm us with their power, they rarely surprise us. We all know who the bullies are in our lives. Everyone in the family knows who the bully is. We know those that think they are better than the rest of us, fearless in the touting of their power. Because we know of their antics, we can anticipate how they will behave and can become unfrozen, determining how we will choose to respond to their next outburst. This knowledge can help balance the power continuum.
Second, keep thinking. Bullies count on us freezing emotionally. They gain their power by overwhelming us emotionally, which they do largely by us freezing in our tracks. But, we can stay alert, remain aware, plan ahead and determine our response. Keep thinking. Notice what is happening. Notice the disrespect the bully uses to get what they want.
Third, set limits on the bully. If they insist that you listen to them, make it clear that you will only do so if they approach you with respect. If they push their agenda, take a stand against them. Be brave enough to simply disagree. If they attempt to force you to go along with their wishes, take time to decide for youself what you will do.
Fourth, celebrate small victories. You may be in a longstanding relationship with a bully, or may be forced to stay in relationship due to your circumstances. Set small goals and celebrate small victories. Simply voicing a contrary opinion may be a wonderful starting place.
Finally, watch the bully shrink as you grow in self-confidence. Bullies thrive on being large and in charge, but they shrink as you grow in self-confidence—perhaps not at first, but in time. This also doesn’t mean that you must overpower them, but that you simply cease allowing them to have the power they have previously enjoyed. Subsequently, in standing up to them they discover they are no longer able to manipulate others.
Bullies have been part of our social and familial fabric since the beginning of time. Jesus stood up against those that forced their will on others, and so can we. Gather support around you as you choose to act with dignity and self-respect. Put the shame back on the person deserving of it—the bully.